I did not know much about the military when my boyfriend decided to enlist. In fact, all I really knew about it was two things :
1. My first high-school boyfriend joined the army and now has a beautiful family.
2. My ex-boyfriend joined the Air-force and broke up with me right before he left to boot camp claiming our lives were going in two separate directions. ( He was going into the military and I was transferring from community college to a four-year college) and he didn’t see how our lives would ever sync back up.
Four months after I got broken up with and thought that my whole life was over…
I met Jeremy.
(We took this picture on the day we became boyfriend and girlfriend July 13, 2015)
I could write a whole novel on how we met but I won’t. We essentially met at a Friendsgiving party and that’s the short story. At the early stages of our friendship both crushing on each other hard. We found ourselves at the top of a hill overlooking the entire city at sunset. I was 23 at that time and he was 18.
(Here is a picture from that day )
At that point in my life, I had turned down being accepted into Kansas University due to the cost of out of state tuition. I explained to Jeremy how much I longed to be there. I wanted to leave California and experience a different state one that actually had seasons. I was only 23 at that time and I felt stuck. I was working the same job I had worked as a 17 year old, living in the same city and I had just been broken up with. I didn’t realize how bad everything I was saying might have sounded like to someone like Jeremy. All he wanted was to date me and all I seem to care about was moving away.
Years after that day he expressed how much I intimidated him. At that time he wanted to date me but he felt like I had it all figured out and there was no room left for him. “I don’t want to live in California” I can still hear myself saying, it was in that moment he knew he had to date me or else he would never get that chance. I dismissed all his requests and pleads for staying in California. Insisting that as soon as I had the opportunity I would jump on it and never look back.
I knew Jeremy had plans of joining the Navy I just thought they would happen after college. He wanted to get his degree first and then go into it. However, sometimes we make plans and how does that saying go? God laughs at them.
Well, it’s true. Jeremy went through the motions for months. School, work, and gym.
He wanted more.
I feel like the enlisting talk first happened at school after he had returned from his brother’s Navy graduation. (One thing about Jeremy is that his Grandpa was in the Navy, his Dad was in the Navy, and now his brother). It was a rush of feelings and emotions and overall satisfaction in a Navy career that led Jeremy to tell me he was planning on enlisting now rather than waiting.
I’m almost positive I had my “Are you sure you want to do this ?” talk with him.
By early summer of 2016 he enlisted.
We spent the next few months with a tentative ship out date. As the days grew near to it the more nightmares I had. I could only really explain it as a constant waking up at 5 am with a sinking feeling in my stomach. At times I would wake up sobbing and other times I would wake up just trying to catch my breath. I would dream of him being gone. The dream would always be the same him being taken away and not allowed to say goodbye. It ached my soul to the point I would text him right away (mind you it’d be 5 am) to make sure he had not left without saying goodbye.
The ship out came and went and so did the next … and the next. My boyfriend got delayed for nearly a year in a half. While I am thankful for the extra time I got to spend with him I also couldn’t help but feel sad. He wanted his future to start now and the Navy was teaching him patience.
Finally he was informed that his ship out date was sometime in December and when he first told me I was like “yeah, yeah I’ve heard that one before”.
Except this time it wasn’t like the previous ship out dates.
My boyfriend really did ship out that month. It was the loneliest December for us both.
While that is where my Navy girlfriend journey begins it is not where it ends.
I hope many of you are able to connect with me for advice or if you have any questions I am here for you. This is why I made this blog to share with you guys my happiness and my ugly truths about being a Navy Girlfriend.